Success secrets from a “shark”

Would you like to learn some success secrets today from a woman who borrowed $1,000 to start a company and later sold it for $66 million?  I thought you might!

Last week I spent a day in New York and a private lunch with the dynamic business whiz Barbara Corcoran, star of ABC-TV’s hit reality show Shark Tank, and I’m eager to pass along her wit and wisdom to you.

Even if you’re not an entrepreneur, what she has to say about life and work will inspire you!

But first …

Happy birthday today to at least two amazing Women on Fire: Dr. Elvira Lang of Boston and MJ Bindu Delekta of Vineyard Haven, Massachusetts!

And, here on Martha’s Vineyard, we’re awash in autumn colors and you may be, too.  I asked my talented husband Rob Berkley to share a scene for you and here is his offering!

Welcome also to new Spark! readers, including therapist Tricia Bennett, who with Heidi Bertram, started the company Be More You to help women find their life partners and for married women to be re-inspired in their relationships.

With Tricia Bennett, creator of Happily Ever After Is Real seminars and teleclasses to help women find the love of their life. (Photo by Rob Berkley)

You’ll be hearing more from Tricia and Heidi in the future. Those of you who are tired of being single and want to be married and in a committed relationship can check out their upcoming seminar October 20-21 in Boston.

OK, so now to the delightful, irrepressible “shark” Barbara Corcoran, author and real estate mogul, and her secrets for being successful!

Obstacles You Must Overcome For Success:

1) Falling prey to the word “no.” You must learn the power of getting past “no.”

2) Forgetting what business you are in. Pick a lane and stay focused in it. Don’t jump all over the place with lots of confusing offers and abilities.

3) Failing to finish what you set out to do.

What Works For Success:

1) Clarity and simplicity when you speak.  “Fancy talk doesn’t work,” says Barbara.

2) The best business ideas come from experience.  Your product has to make a difference. (Example: the flight attendant who invented a device attached to luggage that will carry a child, eliminating the need to travel with a stroller.)

3) Fire people who are habitual complainers. They poison the environment. “Complainers in your business are the equivalent of a thief in your business, stealing your emotional and financial resources,” says Barbara.

4) Become great at failing.  People remember your successes. So quickly move on from your failures and get to your next success. You almost always can make lemonade out of your failures. The trick is to very quickly pick yourself up after a stumble.

5) Two kinds of people in business — expanders and containers. Make sure there is a balance of both in your work and life.

6) Have fun. Fun is good for business. If you are having fun, you are likely succeeding!

And, finally, these words are not from Barbara but the inspiration is:

7) Go for what you want!

And, no better example than Barbara, 63 (who is a mother of an 18-year-old son and 6-year-old daughter).  Her real estate business was evaluated at the time for only half of the $66 million she received.  But her favorite, lucky number was “66” so she went for it — and got it!

Women on Fire was created to support you in whatever you are dreaming of having and doing in your life. I hope one or more of Barbara’s success tips speaks to you and helps you take your dreams a step further.

Let me know!

Have fun this week and I’m counting the days until I see you at the Women on Fire Retreat in Chicago Oct. 26-27 🙂

All quiet here. NOT!

There is so much to tell you!

So, today’s SPARK! is a potpourri of happenings to catch you up on our thriving and growing community – so you can make plans to be as involved as you wish.

In addition, I’ll share some exciting news, too.

(You’re going to find out the Woman on Fire who WON the stylish KiraGrace yoga jacket for participating in our recent survey!)

First …

Happy Mother’s Day to you!  And, if you don’t have children of your own, I bet that you are supporting and nurturing many others. So this day is for you, too.

Happy Mother’s Day to my own inspiring mother — Mary Lue Phillips, who is Women on Fire member #00001! With her grandson and our nephew Tyler, 11.

Thank you to everyone for your interest in our recent trip to Paris.  It was incredible!

The 10 Women on Fire who joined me in France – Angela Ittu, Becky Adams, Doni Belau, Jamie Eslinger, Jill Dulitsky, Kim Davis, Lisa Umberger Arundale, Michelle Whittaker, Susan Kruger Woodcock and Tandi Musuraca — are still bubbling with enthusiasm after our inspiring adventure and transformative experience.

I feel so uplifted from shaking up my day-to-day activities by doing something so out of the rut.  My challenge is to keep the new energy, ideas and super positive feelings going!

And, so far, so good.

Because immediately after Paris, I traveled to Columbus, Ohio where I attended our coaching group called Life, Ignited led by the amazing Jan Allen.  I got to meet with the fabulous participants of this life-changing group.

Life has certainly ignited for these Women on Fire in their monthly coaching group in Columbus, Ohio! From left: Nicole Lovett, Mary Jo Hudson, Jan Allen, Keena Smith, Jane Juergens and Laura Tiberi.

Then, on to two teas in Columbus at our new tea party location The Cambridge Tea House.

This Women on Fire Tea in Columbus featured several Ohio State University students, staff and faculty and it was such a joy to hear their dreams and stories.

The following day, another tea hosted by Jan Allen and Tricia Simpson, seated on the far right end of front row, was held in Columbus. We celebrated Tricia’s birthday!

After each tea party she attends in New York City, Woman on Fire Janette Barber frequently announces: “the tea party always works.”

What Janette means by that is that women leave a Women on Fire event feeling inspired, supported, heard, understood and connected.

In this day and age you hear so much discussion about the importance of communication.  Well, I believe you can communicate and still not feel connected.

Think about many of your interactions with others.  Do you feel valued?  Heard? Cared about? Cheered on? Accepted for who you are?

When the answer to those questions above is a resounding YES, you most likely are feeling emotionally connected.

From what women always tell me, the emotional support that occurs between and among women in our community – whether on a trip to Paris or at a coaching group or a tea or retreat – is what makes the difference to feel truly connected and empowered to go for your dreams.

I am so proud for all of you for the way you treat each other with love and respect and caring and compassion.  Being emotionally connected helps enormously to live the life you dream of.

So, before I leave Columbus, I want to tell you about another exciting happening there this fall.

Woman on Fire and Ohio State University student life assistant vice president Tracy Stuck and her team of phenomenal young women – Ashley Sinram, Jodi Poth,  Yvonne Delaney, Amy Laine, Shannon Melampy – will host a Women on Fire Day on Friday, September 21.  OSU’s vice president for student life Dr. Javaune Adams-Gaston is also instrumental in creating this amazing event!

So, if you are an Ohio State graduate or affiliated with OSU in any way, you can be invited to this inspiring day that will pair 50 experienced women with 50 college students eager to learn from you and share their lives, hopes and dreams.

Also, mark your calendar now to attend our annual Women on Fire Retreat! This year it will be held on Friday and Saturday, October 26-27, 2012 in Chicago.  Look for details in a future SPARK!

And, finally …

You didn’t think I’d forget, did you?  I am so excited to tell you the Woman on Fire whose name was drawn out of our famous straw basket to win the KiraGrace yoga jacket!

Here we go …

Congratulations … Julie Quackenbush of Dublin, Ohio!  Julie, you will be receiving your new jacket soon, courtesy of Woman on Fire yoga clothing designer Kira Karmazin.  I wear the same jacket and I can tell you it is the best!

Thank you to everyone who completed the survey and we will share results from it soon.

Be sure to check out Kira’s wonderful website and her inspiring Grace Yoga project to provide financial sponsorship to teachers and yoga studios for providing yoga and mindfulness training to children.

And, last but not least …

Thank you for all of your positive feedback on my recent interview with ABC-TV reality show Shark Tank star and real estate mogul Barbara Corcoran.

If you aren’t yet a member and receiving these monthly inspirational interviews with fascinating women, I hope you will give yourself the support to be a part of this monthly program.

My dream is that you have your dream.  And, my wish is that on your path you find emotionally satisfying friendships to pave the way!

Lesson from my favorite “Shark”

A few days ago I interviewed real estate mogul Barbara Corcoran and ABC TV’s Shark Tank star for our monthly Women on Fire members’ CD program.

(She was an absolute hoot — funny, candid and inspiring, and I can’t wait for you to hear her wisdom! If you’re not yet a member of our monthly membership and CD program, I’ll leave the details for you in the P.S. section below.)

Barbara Corcoran
Barbara Corcoran (Image courtesy of Barbara Corcoran)

Anyway, Barbara said something profound about success that really has me thinking.

And, Barbara should know about success.  She who turned a $1,000 loan from her boyfriend into a business she sold for $66 million!

Barbara said in her experience the single determining factor for success for whatever you want in your life – more than experience, more than money, more than contacts – is the amount of time we take after failing or being rejected to get back up, dust ourselves off and move forward.

The quicker we reduce “oh, woe-is-me” time, the faster we are back on our path toward what we really want. I buy that, Barbara.

“I started getting a higher and higher batting average because I got better (and faster) at failing. I knew how to fail well,” Barbara told me in a wide-ranging conversation about love, life, business, family and success.

And, her insight also made me explore what happens during that “in between” period of losing my balance and pulling myself back up.

In reviewing my own sorrowful history of being knocked down – and spending months and even years recovering – I know part of what kept me stuck – and kept many of the coaching clients I’ve worked with over the years mired in place – is an inability to simply drop “the story,” forgive (myself, mostly) and get on with it.

Forgiving someone or something – whether you’ve been dumped by your lover, lost your job, been violated or wronged – doesn’t mean you agree with what happened.

Forgiveness means you let go and free up your energy to get on with all the good that is waiting for you.

Way easier said than done, I know!

Over the years, my best strategy for forgiving and shortening that “wallow-in-my-pity” time has been to find role models.  People who have had way bigger transgressions to forgive than I could imagine – yet somehow they’ve released the blame and anger and moved on.

Last week I came upon this video for Project Forgive (Video Link).  I hope you can take five minutes to see what happens when an unthinkable event occurs  where forgiveness would seem nearly impossible.

I was so inspired by Shawne Duperon’s Project Forgive, in which we are all invited to share our forgiveness stories, that I invested in it.

My wish for you is that if there is anything holding you back from the freedom to bolt toward your dreams and goals that you will take a page from Barbara Corcoran’s playbook and ask yourself this:

What is it going to take to shorten the time between when I’m down for the count and I hop back up on my feet?

I would love to hear about any of your own experiences with forgiving and being forgiven.  Please leave comments your comments belowfor us all to learn from.

Have a happy week ahead.

I’ll see Women on Fire members on the LIVE CHAT this Tuesday night where we will discuss your gifts, strengths and talents!

May you always be on the path to living your extraordinary life,